Thursday, December 16, 2010

Reflection

When I was a little girl, I used to lie down on the floor at night and look up through the branches of our Christmas tree. The lights sparkled against the ornaments mesmerizing me. I remember thinking that there were infinite possibilities hidden in those branches. That life was going to be a series of magnificent, sparkling moments.

I left for college in 1989 with my heart set on being a secondary education teacher. I didn't foresee the unplanned pregnancy or the complete breakdown of my immediate family. I didn't notice myself slipping from one branch to another, all the way down until I was on the floor again. It took twenty years.

Last winter I decided to return to secondary education. I forgot to remember I'd been here all along. When I applied for my certification, the state surprised me with a list of courses, (undergraduate courses), I needed to take to fulfill the requirements. Undergraduate courses? What? I TEACH undergraduate courses. I went through some disbelief, a little anger, some angst and hand-wringing. And then I signed up for the classes.

To my surprise I enjoyed them. From day one, I enjoyed the process of becoming a student again. The lessons were pertinent, the other students (Young!) but interesting. I remember thinking "I wish I'd been this prepared when I was an undergrad!"

I was learning humility. Many times I didn't know the answers to questions. Many times the students were there, teaching me about the way kids are learning these days.

So I leave behind this fall of 2010 with a teaching certificate in hand. A goal, no longer deferred. And I look at the Christmas tree while I write this reflection and realize I'm halfway back up the branches.

11 comments:

  1. it seems we all have to "re-climb" at times. congrats to you on your new achievement.

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  2. I loved this. Moments of self reflection are so beautiful. Thank you for sharing.

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  3. A goal no longer differed. What a wonder that is in itself. May the rest of the climb be just as sweet.

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  4. WOW. I just reread this and found about twenty typos. Spellcheck is NOT my freind. :) Remember trusty followers, you can always let me know when I've made horrendous writing mistakes. ;)

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  5. Beautiful analogy, and congrats on the teaching qualification!

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  6. when you ever make one...perhaps,,,,maybe,, lol

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  7. Congratulations, Suzy. Although, whenever I get a glimpse of your life, I almost marvel at your charm and grace. You're a gem.

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  8. Oh Suzy, this is lovely. I am delighted for you and well done. Not everyone is willing to be as forthright. It is amazing when we accept and then enjoy the learning process.

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  9. I enjoyed the reading of your journey. I once looked up through the branches of a Christmas tree too… Thanks for the memory. Congratulations on the accomplishments.

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  10. Congrats on the certificate.

    I was also surprised about the requirements to become a teacher, but I did what I had to do. It was humbling, yet rewarding.

    Have a happy New Year.

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  11. What a beautiful post -- and I know the reason it really hit home for me. I, too, went to school planning to teach at the secondary level. After getting my BA in English (and graduating summa cum laude with a 4.0 in my major!) I just... fizzled. Now, I have a great job at a bank making a little more than I would be if I were teaching, but sometimes I just wish I'd stayed on that path to becoming an educator. With a two-week old baby, I don't envision a job change as my New Year's Resolution, but... proud of you!!

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